Holidays and the in-laws
Three years ago I was sitting in our car outside my mom’s driveway crying because I did not want to spend New Year’s with my husband’s family. I was balling my eyes out because it was going to be the first time not being able to spend this holiday that I have shared with my parents for the past 19 years. It definitely was hard for me but I also understood how important it was for my husband. Plus my best holiday memories were the times I spent them with both my Grandparents and I owe it to my parents for their arrangements. Now, that I’m a mom I want to make sure that my son remembers these special moments with his grandparents, uncles/aunts, and cousins as well. Before my teary accident, my husband and I had settled a plan on how we were going to split the Holidays and so far it has worked. This is definitely something I advise engaged couples or newly married couples to talk about right away.
Here are the game plans my husband and I established:
Alternate – as the gentlemen my husband is, he let me choose first so I choose for our first year to spend Christmas with my family, and that left New Years with his; this is when the teary accident happened haha
And the Next year it’ll be at the other family’s place.
I really enjoy this arrangement because you get to fully be present without any other commitments and enjoy every second without checking your watch or eyeballing your partner to go.
Visit both Families – even though this is not my favorite it still works! The reason why it’s not my fav is because I don’t like watching the clock, it just keeps me from really enjoying my time but like I said, it works! When you take that first bite of Guatemalan tostadas and that sip of atol de elote you forget about that car fight you just had with you husband.
Be the Host – This is always a great opportunity to break the ice between both families! So far we’ve hosted a couple and it’s been big hits! We really enjoy gathering the family together and celebrate these special days with everyone. Every family always brings their favorite plate and tradition to share with everyone. It’s effective and without knowing it’s becoming a new tradition.
FYI: the Aftermath is a mess (cleanup) and if you have OCD you might not enjoy this arrangement.
• Focus on the new traditions you want to create for your own family. It’s ok to break long time traditions to make new once with yours.
• Be Selfless, spend the Holidays with you partners Family if it’s something you haven’t yet.
• Invite Christ to be your honored guest in all your plans and celebrations.
Happy Holidays may you welcome Baby Jesus in your home.
Jenyfer D. Navichoque – Writer, unparalleled love