This week I am writing my blog about four days sooner. The reason for this is that this weekend will be mega busy with a beautiful retreat. Naturally, when I choose my blog topic or when I am deciding I put it into prayer. But this time nothing was coming at me in a concrete way.. until I realized it was right in front of me: serving a retreat.
Seven years ago I said yes to Jesus. Honestly, I was a young teen that didn’t know whether she enjoyed eating or dancing more! A child with a strong attitude said yes to Someone she didn’t really know. In 2009, I had an encounter with God. A living, real, and present God, and that is when my journey as a servant began.
I want to share that this journey has not been easy.. I have lost a lot. I have lost friendships till I cried and my boyfriend has even lost friends because of me. I’ve lost the respect of many because they consider me a hypocrite. I’ve missed many social events because I needed to avoid falling, I’ve lost professional opportunities because I call myself Catholic, I have lost a lot.
Although my losses are pretty heavy, reality is I have gained way more than I deserve. It’s interesting that if I shared with you guys everything I have gained from serving God I would never finish and the blog team would get on to me for surpassing 3,000 words! But what I can share is that what I have received in my service is not measurable, there is not a beginning or an end. Although I am far from perfection, He provides me with what I need in this exact moment and it’s more than enough.
I have been asked several times “why do you do this?” “Why do you invest hundreds of hours a year to this?” Good questions, the reason is because I am crazy, literally crazy in love. Careful, when you are in love you aren’t perfect but you simply do everything for love no matter how illogical it may sound. Do I mess up? All the time! But how can I explain to you guys that our God isn’t a suppressing, judgmental man… He is one that caresses me along the way every single step. When I fall, I kneel to Him and I know He will raise me.
This journey has left me empty of words. He has given me a family (I don’t live near blood family), he has given me exemplary parents, amazing brothers, a man that loves me in a way I couldn’t have imagined being loved, a career where I can accomplish my dreams, and most importantly he has given me salvation. One day I decided to accept this salvation and here I am. Everything I receive as a gift because on my own merits and away from God I would be even more lost. Because yes my humanity is very present in the fight to follow Christ I still get very lost.
In conclusion, God calls us all to serve and I simply said yes. Believe me, it was nothing supernatural on my side, it was a simple yes. I am completely useless away from Him and for this and much more I declare myself a servant of Jesus of Nazareth.
“God doesn’t choose those who are prepared, he prepares those he chooses.” Anonymous
Joandra Ocampo – Writer, unparalleled love